4 Ağustos 2011 Perşembe
One nightmare night. For a long time I had forgotten how is to actually feel sick. Unfortunately I was cruelly reminded. Taking pills, feeling nauseous and the worst thing in the world - vomiting. Everytime I get sick I tell myself to do everything possible before vomiting. But no matter how hard you try, it is uncontrollable. Sooner or later you will vomit. There is nothing more disgusting and unpleasant than vomiting. (there is actually, - die suffocated on your own vomit). Only when I get sick, I realize that is really bad being sick. When I was younger I used to wish so bad to get sick in order to skip classes and be loved and take cared of by my whole family, and to get gifts and everything I wanted to eat. But when you are actually sick things are not great as you have pictured. You will bunk college and get treated well, but you might end up in a hospital and all the gifts or great food in the world won't make you feel better. When I was younger I was hospitalized twelve times with pneumonia. After vomiting the whole night also made think about people that actually force themselves to purge for the purpose of weigh loss . Honestly?
Now I lie here slowly sipping tea, feeling like a retiree.